movies.

so good...but so incredibly sad.

don't let this cutesy poster fool you...

this one's fucking sad, too.

it totally struck a nerve with me.

worth a watch.

this is one of the best new movies

i've seen in a looooooong time.

an older favourite worth mentioning.

if you haven't seen it, do so immediately.

since i brought up diving bell,

here's another french language film i enjoyed.

uta.

a close friend of mine lost their very best friend today...

Rest in peace, Uta.

bloggity blog blog blog.

"dream anatomy"

i got some money stuff sorted out today, got school stuff sorted out yesterday. nursing school is finally happening this fall and at last i have people supporting me instead of dealing with someone trying everything possible to stop me.

& unless true love slaps me sharply in the face (or stabs me in the heart?)...i'll likely be single for the entire duration of my studies.

what came first...

Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable?

Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?

band geek.

my first concert with the band is tonight!

i can barely contain my nerdy excitement.

ugly truths.

i'm having a crummy day...

which seems fucked up 'cause i slept for the entirety of it.

some days i feel like things are harder for me than for other people.

like their bumps in the road are no match for the mountains on mine.

it's so fucking silly. and i really just wish it could be different.

a confession: despite being the great pretender that i am,

i just want what everyone else wants.

i also wish i could stop having nightmares about my broken heart.

but maybe these dreams are some kind of sick twisted reminder

that my ticker really is still working...

or has the potential to be re-broken? i really hope so.

i've been detached since fall...can't seem to get stuck on anyone

even though i really, really want to.

i don't want this blog to be a downer.

happier entries to come...today's just a bad day.

i want this.

so rad.

secret.

i hope my heart can still love. & even still be broken.

despite how it may appear, i don't want to be indestructible.

the truth is, what i really want is this, if it exists...

hmmmf.

i hate drama. for real.

valentine's day.

another valentine's day has come and gone and despite being single this year, the day didn't go much differently than last year at all. only this time i didn't do sweet things for a love who didn't return the favour...being alone kicks the ass of being treated like shit by someone who claims to love you.

i'll never settle for less than i deserve ever again.

living well is the best revenge.

susceptible to strong emotion.

intensity - by julie pflanzer

intense [in-tens]

-adjective

1. existing or occurring in a high or extreme degree: intense heat.

2. acute, strong, or vehement, as sensations, feelings, or emotions: intense anger.

3. of an extreme kind; very great, as in strength, keenness, severity, or the like: an intense gale.

4. having a characteristic quality in a high degree: the intense sunlight as blinding.

5. strenuous or earnest, as activity, exertion, diligence, or thought: an intense life.

6. exhibiting a high degree of some quality or action.

7. having or showing great strength, strong feeling, or tension, as a person, the face, or language.

8. susceptible to strong emotion; emotional: an intense person.

9. (of colour) very deep: intense red.

after the storm.

And after the storm,

I run and run as the rains come

And I look up, I look up

On my knees and out of luck,

I look up

Night has always pushed up day

You must know life to see decay

But I won't rot, I won't rot

Not this mind and not this heart,

I won't rot

And I took you by the hand

And we stood tall,

And remembered our own land,

What we lived for

And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears

And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears

Get over your hill and see what you find there,

With grave in your heart and flowers in your hair.

And now I cling to what I knew

I saw exactly what was true

But oh no more

That's why I hold,

That's why I hold with all I have

That's why I hold.

I will die alone and be left there

Well I guess I'll just go home,

Oh God knows where

Because death is just so full and mine so small

Well I'm scared of what's behind and what's before

And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears

And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears

Get over your hill and see what you find there

With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair

And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears

And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears

Get over your hill and see what you find there

With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.

-Mumford and Sons

cool collage chaos.

snip, snip

i'm loving art lately.

♥

paint splatter.