i vant to suck your blood.

the school year came to a close
2 weeks ago...
i spent 4 days at the lake with
some of the girls
i've leaned on all year.
it was a much-needed escape.

i think we all had days where we
felt like throwing in the towel.

i honestly thought that i had
realistic expectations for nursing school,
but it's proven to be much, much harder
than i ever anticipated it could be.

starting tonight i'm back at work
full-time for the summer,
overnights as usual, bleh.
the vampire shift sucks,
but the money is good.

being in school was a nice, albeit temporary,
distraction from being flat broke.
i was too busy studying to notice.
but i just have to keep reminding myself...
2 more years.

the grueling financial hardship &
personal sacrifice
will all be worth it in the end,
i know it will.

other than that...

life is different lately.

despite financial stresses,
i'm quite content.

i experienced something recently that
i hadn't for quite some time
- i missed someone.
which i realize seems like
such a simple thing,
but for me this is a big deal...

because for so long,
i felt like i had just been
going through motions,
trying to force myself to exhibit
any shard or remnant of emotion.
soooooo...

i could get used to this.